Boudreaux and a Russian are set to square off for the Olympic Gold Medal in Wrestling.

Before the final match, Coach Thibodeaux says, 'Mais, doan forget all duh research we done on dis Russian. He's neva' loss a match because of dis 'Pretzel' hold he got.

Whateva' you do, doan let him git you in dat hold! If he does, you're fanished!'

Boudreaux nodded in acknowledgment.

As the match started, Boudreaux and the Russian circled each other several times, looking for an opening. All of a sudden, the Russian lunged forward, grabbing Boudreaux and folding his body in the dreaded 'Pretzel' hold!

A sigh of disappointment arose from the crowd and Coach Thibodeaux buried his face in his hands, for all he knew, all was lost. He couldn't watch the inevitable happen.

Suddenly, there was a scream! Then a cheer from the crowd! Coach Thibodeaux raised his eyes just in time to watch the Russian go flying up in the air, his back on the mat with a thud, as Boudreaux collapsed on top of him making the pin and winning the match!

Coach Thibodeaux was astounded. When he finally got Boudreaux alone he asked him, ' How you got out dat hold?

No one has eva' done dis before!'

Bodreaux answered slowly, 'Mais, Ah was ready to give up, when he got me in dat hold, but at duh lass moment, Ah opened ma' eyes and saw dis pair of nuts right in front of ma' face.

Ah had nothing to lose, so wit' ma' lass ounce of strength... Ah stretched out ma' neck ... and bit dose boogers juss as hard as Ah could!'

' So,' exclaimed Thibodeaux , 'Is dat what fanished him off?'

'Mais, not really', said Boudreaux. ' You'd be amazed how strong you git when you bite ya' own nuts!'

---

< Lafferz of America Unite >, 1998. All Rights Reserved. Steal It All You Want

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